Goodbye 2011, Hello 2012

In 2011:

I turned a quarter of a century old 26 OHMYGOSH why can't I remember how old I am???
I finished my first year of teaching -- 8th grade Language Arts.
I spent my first summer completely free from any job or obligations... and it was wonderful.
I built a blanket-and-pillow fort in my living room and spent the whole day in it--twice.
I dyed my hair purple for a while. Then black, to cover up the purple and be an adult again.
I hosted a Harry Potter party, a Star Wars party, and co-hosted another HP party and a beautiful candlelit Edgar Allan Poe party.
I sewed things.
I knit things.
I crocheted things.
I wrote 50,000 words of a novel for the 7th year in a row during November's NaNoWriMo challenge.
I had a couple of outdoor tea parties with my wonderful knitting group, Weekly Fiber.
I rode my bicycle, Mabel (although not as much as I would have liked to).
I wandered the Farmer's Market several times, although I only ever bought peaches and a delicious ham and cheese crepe.
I lived on almost nothing but Ramen and beans for a week at a time, several times.
I got a cat, and we slowly got used to one another.
I spent way too much time on Facebook and Pinterest (which probably contributed to the minimal blogging).
I spent a fantastic weekend in Denver with my husband, who whisked me away for a birthday getaway of rich food, a funny play, lots of walking, and even a little history.
I had some really spectacular fails as a teacher, but some really great wins, too.
I became obsessed with 1920's fashion, hair, makeup, and music.
I helped plant grass in our tiny back yard.
I spent my fourth Christmas without my little brother, Logan. Miss him every day.
I became very discouraged about ever getting pregnant after a heartbreaking miscarriage in 2010, then angry with God, then resigned, then at peace that everything will happen in his perfect timing.
I said goodbye to some wonderful 8th graders, and was holding the door wide open for others to leave.
I welcomed a new crop of 8th graders, who seemed so small and strange at the beginning of the year, and how are now just "my kids" (although they are still certainly strange).
I grew a little more distant from some friends and a little closer with others.
I read a lot of really good books and a few crummy ones.
I hosted a nice little New Year's Eve party last night with board games, snacks, and good friends.

Goodbye, 2011! You were a good year, a hard year, a memorable year.

In 2012:

I will spend less time on the computer and more time reading books.
I will purge useless/broken/unwanted/unused stuff from the house.
I will write at night in my Book of Days planner/journal at least a few lines about that day.
I will be a better housekeeper (which will hopefully be easier to do with less Stuff).
I will be a better listener and not an interrupter or a wait-until-you're-done-talking-so-I-can-say-what-I-wanted-to-say-er.
I will pray more.
I will write more--more letters, more blog posts, more journal entries, more stories, more poems.
I will find a lesson plan format that works for me and I will plan in advance as well as I am able.
I will remember that I am not teaching Language Arts, I am teaching people.
I will not dwell on the past any more than I can absolutely help.
I will Skype loved ones that live far away.
I will love this year.

Welcome, 2012!

Letter to Teacher

Dear Mrs. N________,

I wanted to write this letter to you to thank you! You have helped me understand literacy, and grammer alot more! I dont want you to proof this because I want it to be a surprise! Im sorry for me being talkative, and noisy during class, but that's just my personality. I'm not going to be here on Friday to say goodbye to you. I'm really going to miss your fun, and wierd style! But your style is a good wierd, because it makes you look like you dont care about peoples thoughts. I'm gonna miss you!

From,
M__________

May 25, 2011

Tea Party

I'm going to give my students index cards with the sentences below on them. They'll each have one card, and each card will show up about 3 times in each class since there are multiples. Then they'll mill around and talk to as many people as possible, like you would at a tea party, reading what's on their card out loud and hearing what other people have on their cards. After that, they'll talk at their tables and try and come up with the basic story-line. This is before reading any of the story.

Based on the following snippets, what do you think the story will be about?

One dollar and eighty-seven cents.

Life is made of up sobs, sniffles, and smiles.

Something fine and rare and sterling

“Please, God, make him think I am still pretty.”

just to see him pluck his beard from envy.

her face had lost its color within twenty seconds

“Shall I put the chops on, Jim?”

He simply stared at her fixedly with that peculiar expression on his face.

Well?

...

........

It's "The Gift of the Magi" by O. Henry. Go and read it if you haven't before. It's a lovely Christmas story and definitely a classic!

We'll be talking about theme and doing some other things to understand/comprehend and remember the story. Hopefully it goes over well!

Bittersweet

Boy, am I glad school is out! Thank the Lord! I made it! Thank you, everyone, for your support. For listening to (or reading about) me whining, for saying "You can do it!" and "It will be worth it!" and "You will be great!" and "I know you will get a job!" Honestly, I am so glad I will never have to see a few of those kids again! No more waking up at 5:30 five days a week (although I'll do that occasionally for the summer job). No more dressing up in heels and skirts most days. I don't have to wear makeup all summer if I don't want to! I won't have to send anyone to the office, or shush kids while they're reading, or make them learn about adjectives for three months! Goodbyeeeeeeeeeeee!

****

No more dressing up in heels and skirts! No more full makeup in the mornings! I won't have a desk with my cute sticky notes on it and my bulletin board with pictures students drew for me. I won't write the schedule on the whiteboard every day or fill out my planner with them. I put my blood, sweat and tears into this year! (Blood = so many paper cuts!!!) I spent more time with those kids and teachers than with my husband! They were my family! And I'm so sad about never seeing most of them again. They are such cool, funny, interesting, brilliant kids. Some of them will be our doctors, nurses, lawyers, actors, inventors, video game makers, artists, bankers, librarians, authors, teachers, and dentists. (Some of them will be our oil field workers, construction guys, burger flippers, and Wal-Mart greeters--also valuable vocations.) They will get their braces off and drive cars and go to prom and someday be real people! I feel so valued and lucky to have been a small part of shaping them. And I will still think about them very often and remember the funny, awesome, stressful, and touching times with them and wonder how they are doing. I hope that, very occasionally, they remember Mrs. N for a little while, too. Hopefully I taught them just one thing they'll use or treasure or enjoy. Hopefully I made a little bit of a difference.

****

P.S. I wish I could show you pictures of the rafting trip on Tuesday! But I can't legally show pictures of other people's kids. I might have to post one, though, with the faces blurred out, because it's great....

Update letter

Dear Reader,

I have 8 days of school left. EIGHT! My duties are now those of a glorified student aide, which is honestly just fine with me. I'm making copies, cleaning, organizing, and getting portfolios of the students' work together.

I had an interview last week, but as I haven't heard back, probably didn't get the job. There's nothing more I can do, job-wise, but wait for calls for interviews. Pray!

I train for my summer job next week, and start June 1st. I'll be working at a daycare run through the city rec center. I think it'll be fun!

We still have not started our garden. Does anyone in town have a tiller they'd like to loan us for a day?

I appreciate that you're still reading this, although it's been a month (exactly) since my last really dinky post. Hopefully I'll have lovely things to write about here all summer.

How have YOU been? What are your summer plans? Are you going anywhere exciting? Anywhere boring? What kind of books do you think you'll read? Will you lie out in the sun? Take the dog for walks? Sleep until noon? Get up early and accomplish many things? I miss youuuuuuu!

Love,
Heather

200th post

Dear Sune,

Stop being so freakin' adorable. I just want to throw the squeaky giraffe for you over and over again instead of doing work. You look so earnest when you "ask" me to play!

Love,
Mommy

___________________

Dear Dog Next Door,

SHUT UP! There is NOTHING out there to bark at, and even if there is, clearly you're not doing any good since it's still there! Seriously, my husband is about to go over there and offer you hamburger with rat poison in it or something.

Much frustration,
Heather

___________________

Dear April,

Can you be over, now? If you're over, that means my portfolio and my 4 units will have been turned in and I won't have to worry about them anymore. That means I'll be three weeks closer to the end of the school year, and maybe, just maybe, the weather might be somewhat more predictably decent.

If you're not going to be over, then at least go really slowly so I have loooootssss of time to work on these big projects, okay?

Thanks,
Frazzled Student Teacher

___________________

Dear Husband,

I love you sooooooooo much! You are amazing for cooking, cleaning, shopping, and bill-paying during these last few really hard weeks. You've put up with me crying for no reason, encouraged me, and done all of this without complaning. I owe you this summer and will make it up to you!

Love love love,
Your wife

___________________

Dear Students,

I'm totally not jinxing it or anything, but you've been pretty good the past couple of weeks. Keep it up, eh? Much more enjoyable days for everyone, all around.

33 more days!
Mrs. N.

P.S. I really am going to miss you when this year is over, as amazing as that may seem to you. I might even get a little teary the last day, just to warn you. Please come back and say hi when you can. That's what teachers live for.

___________________

Dear Coffee,

I love you with a loyal and undying passion. Never leave me.

Yours,
Heather

I wrote a poem

So, clearly the "poem a day" thing didn't last too long here. I went back and tagged the early posts with "poetry" in addition to "poem a day," as well as the successive randomly-posted poems, too. Poems by other people are tagged as "guest poets."

Here is one I wrote for my class of 7th-graders for our Africa unit. They've read and researched about some pretty hardcore stuff, both on the internet and in books, and in poem form. I consciously included specific figurative language like similes, onomatapoeia, and sensory detail; also, I used some different line breaks and punctuation to show them the possibilities for writing poetry are nearly endless.

Famine

My tongue is swollen,
my throat as dry as the desert all around me.
When there is water to drink
in careful, slow drips,
it only makes my insides twist and cramp
until I hurt too much
to even cry.

I am small,
too small to fight for food.
Other children, bigger children, shout and push and
scramble to pick
specks
of
grain
out
of
dung,
or a flaky tree root
from the earth,
(earth: Mother,
betrayer)
and gobble them down.
I only watch and wither away,
my belly growing bigger each day.

My parents: dead.
no prayers or spells
or medicine
(if we could buy it)
could have saved them.
My sister: dead.
I carried her everywhere,
her little legs too tiny,
like dried twigs,
to walk.
One day her rattling breath stopped, and
I put her down
and didn't look back.

What would have been the point?

I am a bubble on the surface
of a cup
of water,
dirty and sickly.
A bubble too small
and insignificant
to notice.
I live only a moment,
then

POP

I am gone.

I love my principal

Said in the staff meeting today: "I know it's at that point in the school year where you maybe start to wonder... would jail really be that bad?"

This IS a Test

Hmm, poems? What poems?

***

I'm giving this to my 7th graders tomorrow to prove a point. We'll see how it goes.

***

Read the directions all the way through before completing any tasks.

1. Put your name on the paper, but not the block.
2. Draw a smiley face in the top left corner of this paper.
3. Underline all the e's in this sentence.
4. Underline all the e's in #1.
5. What is the name of your favorite pet, past or present?
6. How long have you lived in the house you are currently in?
7. Circle the number seven.
8. What is your favorite color?
9. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?
10. Cross out your last name and write your first name instead.
11. Draw a frowny face in the bottom left corner of this paper.
12. What is your favorite animal?
13. Fold the paper in half and put it in the top right corner of your desk, then get out your Independent Reading book and read.
14. Go back and only do 1, 7, 10, and 13
15. Thank you for participating – please read directions!

Jan. 25

This is your brain:



This is your brain after
instructing,
reminding,
nagging,
encouraging,
scolding,
prodding,
shaping,
teasing,
coaxing,
and maybe even
teaching
12-year-olds all day:



(Or is that just my brain?)

Jan. 21

When the fields sprout green,
that's when I'll be home.
I got a job to do,
and a man's gotta roam.

When the rows grow tall,
that's when I'll come back.
You got a lot of work to do,
so you better not slack.

When the hills turn to gold,
I'll be back then.
You just sew my shirts,
and get the corn in.

Fields a cold winter white
Your shack a hot light.
My heart warmed by the sight.
I'm leaving tonight.

*****

Buh, so much for one poem every day. Not going to try and catch up, though. This was just the Killer Week of Grading Doom. I'm still behind, but we had conferences tonight (making for a 7am-7pm workday), so I'm not doing ANYTHING productive tonight. In fact, I'm heading to bed here in a bit. YAY FRIDAY TOMORROW!!!

8 Things Friday

1. I survived the first week back at the middle school! Monday was a teacher work day, so we only had the kids four days this week. Tuesday was about five years long, but each successive day went a little quicker. Kim and I kind of team-taught this week, but starting next week for 8 full weeks in a row (right til the end of 3rd quarter, actually), it's all me, baby. Here we go!

2. I really wish I would either GET this cold, be miserable all weekend, and get over it, or NOT get this cold, and be done. I'm tired of a little bit of a drippy nose, a little bit of a sore throat, occasional coughing.... Make up your mind, you stupid bug!!! It's been a week!

3. Casual Fridays at the school make me feel weird. I have exactly one pair of jeans that's comfortable to wear all day and still look good. So to school, and almost everywhere else, I wear skirts and dresses, or dress pants/khakis. Today I wore an old pair of Matt's jeans that he bought in the wrong size but didn't realize til he'd worn them (squished) for a while, so it was too late to return them. They're comfy, yes, but not the most flattering jeans on me.

4. Why do guys' jeans get REAL POCKETS? I can fit my whole hand in the front pockets of those jeans! Yet girlie jeans have leetle bitty pockets about two inches deep--they don't hold anything, and it's lame. Not fair! (I went to Goodwill this afternoon and got 2 "new" pair of jeans--nice ones!--for $5 each! Yay, now I have girl jeans. Even if the pockets suck.)

5. Here are really bad pictures of our new bedroom:



The walls are a little more tan than orange in real life, and the curtains are dark brown but look blue because of the sun coming through them. Matt's aunt amazingly knitted us that blanket for a wedding gift.



Obviously it needs some work--accessories, for sure--but I'm really pleased with it! I think the floor Matt put in all by himself looks awesome! I think my painting job of the walls, ceiling, and trim (as well as the back of the door, which is dark brown like the trim) is also awesome! If you have any ideas about how to make it look like the cabin of a steampunk airship captain, let us know!

6. Goals for the rest of the school year (I'm not saying the whole year because, well, one thing at a time; I'll set new ones for the summer, then again for the fall):
a. go to bed earlier
b. spend more time with Matt
c. eat less junk
d. keep the house a little cleaner

Nothing huge and drastic. I just want to make small improvements, a little at a time. And mostly I want to survive this semester, so the less extra stress I put on myself, the better.

7. I really really like this comic, Copper. Especially this one and this one (hmm, see #6 above). It's about a boy and his dog, and the magical, imaginary worlds they spend time in together. Cute, funny, touching... sometimes all three at once.

8. Poem:

Ugh, such a long week.
Friday now, and I'm tiiiiiired.
You get a haiku.

A Seventh Grade Boy's Afternoon

Sit at desk.
Get up, sharpen pencil.
Kick friend on way back to desk.

Sit at desk.
Drop pencil.
Nearly break chair
leaning over to pick up pencil.
Apologise to teacher when rebuked.

Sit at desk.
Tap-tap-tap.
Tap-tap-tap-tap.
Tap.
Taptaptaptaptaptaptaptap!
Apologise to teacher when rebuked.

Sit at desk.
Excavate draft from folder.
Scribble in margins.
Poke friend with pencil.
Mark on other friend's paper with pencil.

Sit at desk.
Wriggle,
lean chair,
hum,
hum louder,
apologise to teacher when rebuked.

Get up.
Move desk against wall
with back to friends.

Sit at desk.
Tap.
Tap.
Tap-tap.

Sit at desk.






Start writing.

Jan. 5 Poem and First Day Back

Yards of yarn.
Click-clack-click.
Knitting needles
swoosh swiftly up and down.

A cup of cocoa,
cozy socks,
and a ruby red robe.

Winding down like a sleepy watch,
like a ball of yarn
unrolling itself across the rug.

___________________________

Yesterday was a teacher work day, which went well. We didn't get a ton of stuff done, but we did get some projects and copies done, and plan out the next two weeks of literacy, and I'm feeling less panicky than I was during the last week of break. We'll be wrapping up some things we've been doing for at least the next three weeks, so it's not like "Heather has to come up with a whole month-long unit SOON," which is what I was concerned about.

Today was the first day the kids were back and it was... long. Lonnnnnnnnnnnnnnng. Hopefully the following days go by a little quicker, and at least it's only really a four-day school week. This week, my mentor teacher is taking first block literacy, I'll take second block literacy, and we'll kind of team-teach third block geography. Then next week, it's all me, baby. For eight weeks in a row, I have to be "lead teaching" by myself--that means the planning and grading, too, for the most part. She'll still be there for support during and reflection after classes, and I'll have her and the other 7th grade literacy teacher to help plan and such, so I'll be fine. I'm just sure I'll come home exhausted every day, at least until I really get into the swing of it.

After that, it's CSAP time (Colorado's standardized test that all school kids after 3rd grade have to take), and I'll kind of back off to let them do that. Then it's 4th quarter, towards the end of which I can go around and observe at other schools to broaden my horizons, and then... I'll be done! This is the general, far-reaching plan.

Having finished my hot chocolate already, I think I'll knit for just a little while, and then get to bed.

Jan. 4

Shiny buffed floors and
pine-sol smell
in the school hallways.

Dragging desks back
across clean carpet.

Blindingly white boards,
pristine cafeteria,
and still snow.

Building and staff alike
brace themselves
for the return of the students.

Goodbye 2009

The year two-thousand-and-nine was a tough one. I went back to school and had to deal with late nights of homework and learning new (sometimes scary) things. We bought a house and found out more than we ever wanted to know about mortgages, loans, and working on something that's entirely ours (and the bank's). We dropped down to one income, since I've only worked a few shifts here and there since July, due to the massive amount of school stuff I've been doing.

But here we are, at the end of another year. I also met some great people who are interested in English and young people and teaching, like me. I had some great experiences with "my" kids at the middle school where I've been student teaching. I love our home, and I love that we finally have our first dog together.

It's been hard, it's been tiring, but I'm happy.

Since Matt has a cold and our company can't make it due to yucky weather over the passes, we're going to take it easy today and tonight. Have a fun and blessed 2010!

And go read this post, since this sums things up more nicely than I can at the moment.

Hello again

Today is my Friday, sort of. I'm only in school two days this week (both schools) because of Thanksgiving break. It won't be too much of a break, but oh well. Wednesday I intend on catching up and (hopefully) even getting ahead in my NaNoWriMo novel. I'm at just over 36,000 words right now, and by the end of today I should be at 40,000, so I'm somewhat behind. (I did write a little over 6,000 words on Sunday, though, which was awesome!) Most of the story is trash and I don't think I'll do anything with it, but for the last week, it's at least been fun to write. I'm making new characters and my MC is seeing new places, and I always love writing description.

I've also been knitting a lot (not at the middle school, but in my college classes), and I currently have 6.3 pairs of wristwarmers knit up (but not sewn--bleh, don't like that part much). I'd like to sell them at the vintage store/art gallery downtown, but if they sit there for a long time and don't sell, maybe I'll open up my old Etsy store and see how they do there. They're all diferrent sizes, colors, and patterns, and by "patterns" I mean stitch patterns. I didn't actually use patterns for any of them, just invented them off the top of my head depending on what kind/color and how much yarn I had. Most of it is leftover little balls after I finished knitting socks, though some of it is from various other projects. All of them are at least partially wool, for warmth and because the shop doesn't seem like a place that caters to people who would like cheap acrylic.

Totally rambling now. After today, I have to be on (the college) campus four more days, and two of them are for finals. AUGHHHHHHHHHH! In a way, I'm really glad, but I'm also kind of freaking terrified. There's still a lot to do between now and then, but I'll get it done! As for the middle school, I have 15 more days, though of course not much will get done the last couple days before Christmas break. I have my last observation on the 9th, and I'm using the lesson plan I wrote for another class, so whew! One less thing to worry about.

Matt and I will be back in our hometown for Thanksgiving with my family, then we both work all weekend. Black Friday I'm working just over 9 hours, while Matt works 12. ICK. (But yay for him, he gets commission!) Then Saturday for both of us, and likely Sunday, too. Freakin retail. I'm glad we have jobs, but we will both be soooo glad when we don't have to go through this ridiculosity every holiday seaason.

So let's see, writing, school, knitting.... That about sums up my life these past few weeks! No promises, but I would like to post here more over my breaks. We'll see how that goes. (Need to work on a new header, too.)

Buh-guh-uhhhh...

Goodness, it's been almost a whole month since I last posted, and that wasn't even a real post! (No, I was not able to recover those six pages, but I got over and and wrote them again. *Sigh*) I'm so busy all the time, and when I'm not busy, I'm either playing catch-up on all the stuff I've missed while I was busy (grocery shopping, cleaning, laundry) or chilling out so I can function the rest of the time. Those of you who know me "in real life" see me occasionally on Facebook; those of you that don't... well, you're probably not even reading this blog anymore because of lack of updates!

Since it's late at night and I can't phrase anything in an interesting way, I give you a little update, in the form of a list.

1. School (college classes) is going all right. I'm not able to keep up with all the reading, but the papers and projects are going just fine, and I like being in class because of the discussions we have. Very interesting (nerdy, English-y, teacher-y) stuff.

2. Other school (middle school) is also going well. Parent-teacher conferences were Wednesday night and all day Thursday, but I'll save my ruminations on that for the reflection journal I have to keep for one of my education classes. If the entry is any good, and would make any sense to someone not in my classroom, I might post it here.

3. Halloween is in a week! My second-favorite holiday ever. I sort of invited myself to go trick-or-treating with a friend and her kids (two of them, 4 and 7) because no one I knew, to my knoweldge, was doing anything fun on Halloween to which I was invited. Anything in town either costs to much, is overrun with old people (like the charity masked ball) or involves heavy drinking at one of the "clubs." No thank you. So I will be Snow White and traipse around with (I think) a princess, a bottle of glue, and a guy with a sword. Yay!

4. NaNoWriMo is also coming up! Yes, I'm going to attempt it despite all my crazy business. I may not reach 50,000 words (for the first time in five years! *wince*), but I do still want to write something during the month of November, and try to make at least some of the write-ins. What is my novel about? Look at my Halloween costume! Yes, another retelling. (Two years ago I did a modern-day Pride and Prejudice, which turned out... eh. All right. Still unfinished, so apparently not good enough to continue after November.) I'm not sure where I'm going with it, but at least I have sort of a plot and a handful of characters.

5. Yes, we've lived in this house for 3 months, and I still cannot see the top of my sewing table. There's always so much to do (especially when it comes to cleaning) and so little time to do it! Luckily, I don't have to sew anything for my costume. I just miss it! I'd love to make even a pair of PJ pants, or hem a curtain, or something! Until the day when I can get to it, though, I'll content myself as best I can with knitting (much more portable, doesn't take up nearly as much space) and other random crafting. (I'm fashioniong a poison apple for Halloween, and I bought stuff to make a Fall wreath for the front door, too.)

6. Sune is wonderful and adorable, of course. She had a bath tonight and is all fluffy and pretty. If she wasn't a mutt, she would be a lovely show dog, I think. She just... makes me happy. I want to snuggle her all the time. (Geeze, if I'm this bad about my freaking dog, how bad will I be when I have a real kid of my own?)

7. This coming week is Red Ribbon Week (sort of like Spirit Week is for high schoolers, but with a "Say no to drugs!" theme) at the middle school. Each day has a themed dress-up day, and I'll try to take pictures of my outfits during the week. It's like a whole week of Halloween for me, so you know I'm thrilled!

8. (Hey, this is Thing 8! Could this count as an 8 Things Friday, just a day late?) I miss blogging. I do little mini-blogs (micro-super-mini!) on Facebook, but it's just not the same. Maybe I could start doing some Wordless Wednesdays like some of my blogging friends, and a Linktastic Thursday/Sunday/Whateverday. That's minimal-ish writing effort on my part, but still some form of blogging and communication with all three people still reading this thing. We'll see, I guess!